Cantor Ellie Shaffer
InterfaithWedding.com
Serving Pennsylvania, New Jersey, Delaware & Maryland
215-885-7326
e-mail: ellie_InterfaithWedding.com
Is a cantor equal to a rabbi when it comes to legally performing a wedding, and signing the wedding license?
According to the laws of Pennsylvania , New Jersey, Maryland, Delaware and most other states, a cantor may legally perform wedding ceremonies if that person is degreed by a recognized Seminary for Jewish Religion, or if he or she is salaried and receives parsonage as clergy by a synagogue belonging to the Union of American Hebrew Congregations. Cantor Ellie meets
all the legal requirements and is fully able to perfom your marriage ceremony.
How do you co-officiate with other clergy? Who does what?
We share the portions of the text equally, flowing seamlessly from one officiant to the other and back. While the ceremony is the same whether there be one or two members of the clergy, some brides or grooms simply feel more comfortable with a person of their own faith co-officiating. Text itself is spiritually chosen to reach out to everyone present, embracing all.
There are hostile members of our family that don't want us to marry. (And some of our parents are in second marriages and aren't speaking to one another.) How do you create a harmonious atmosphere out of such chaos?
An amazing phenomenon often occurs during weddings. When the actual ceremony begins, and the room becomes hushed, all the divergent, myriad feelings of all the people present come together on a tidal wave of love for the bride and the groom. If the words used in the ceremony are chosen lovingly and tactfully, weddings can be miraculous cathartic events, where pettiness is put aside and a real sense of community is created. Words must be chosen very carefully, for the future happiness of the two people who are getting married rides on these words.
How long is the average ceremony?
The groom and bride have input here, with the caterer's constraints coming into play also. Very generally, less than a half-hour is too short, and more than an hour is too long.
Would you marry us in our home? We prefer it to a hall, and our guest list is small.
How wonderful to be wed in the place where you will build a home together. To officiate in such a setting would be a privilege.
You mention humor as a must for an Interfaith Wedding ceremony. Why?
Humor is so good at dissipating tension. Weddings can be such stressful, trying affairs. Strategically placed humor, sparingly used, can calm and soothe, enabling everyone to relax and revel in each joyous moment as it unfolds.
Can you recommend music for the processional that's in keeping with the ecumenical flavor of our wedding?
Absolutely. There are so many beautiful choices-- classical selections, love songs -- and of course, special music for that dramatic moment when the bride stands, transfixed and lovely, in the doorway. I've officiated at hundreds of weddings, and I still get goosebumps at that moment.
As a Cantor, do you sing as well as speak during the ceremony?
Absolutely, if the bride and groom like. The old adage, "Music speaks louder than words" might well apply here. People respond to music; it reaches them. So a song the bride and groom first danced to may be injected, or a Hebrew line, (which is then translated), or a melody with lyrics so beautiful it makes everyone present want to be married all over again!
Do you allow creative readings other than the traditional portions from the Songs of Solomon, Ecclesiastes, Corinthians? Can we provide you with our own readings, or choose to have no readings at all?
This is your wedding. It will be tailored around the words and music you love.
©1999-2012 Interfaith Wedding.com
